Resources


Holiness by Grace
Holiness By Grace,
Bryan Chapell

In this challenging yet heartwarming work, Bryan Chapell illustrates the principles of grace, the practices of faith, and the motives of love in living a life of holiness.
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What’s So Amazing About Grace, by Philip Yancey
What is grace? Do we really understand it? And how do we live it out in our lives?An engaging and provocative look at grace from best-selling author Philip Yancey.
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Samson and the
Pirate Monks,
by Nate Larkin
With no-holds-barred honesty and poignant storytelling, Nate Larkin introduces a model of community and friendship that is reinvigorating men's ministry across the country, a model he calls The Samson Society.
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June/July 2008  Vol. 4  No.3

Grace On Tap
By Gary Yagel

 “For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ”  John 1:17

 During the Great Awakening Jonathan Edwards was leading a massive prayer meeting of over eight hundred men when he received a message from a wife requesting that the men pray for her husband, whose “spiritual pride had led him to be unloving, prideful, and difficult.” Thinking that perhaps the husband was in attendance at the prayer meeting, Edwards read the prayer request to the eight hundred men, then asked if the man who had been described would raise his hand so that the rest of the men could pray for him. Three hundred men raised their hands.

A foundational principle in men’s ministry is recognizing that even though our men know Christ died for their sins, many, perhaps most, still feel too dirty and sinful to be loved by a holy God. No matter how good our programs are, how rich our Biblical insights may be, or how successful we are at helping men better connect, our men’s ministry will fall flat if our men’s guilt and failure make them doubt God’s love for them. Like Adam and Eve, their shame will drive them away from God unless their Christian life is built on the foundation of grace.

During a British conference on comparative religions, experts from around the world debated what belief, if any, was unique to the Christian faith. They discussed the fact that other religions had some form of incarnation, and accounts of someone returning from the dead. The debate continued until C. S. Lewis wandered into the room. Lewis asked what the rumpus was about, and heard that his colleagues were discussing Christianity’s uniqueness among world religions. Lewis responded, “Oh, that’s easy. It’s grace.”

Every other religion teaches that we must earn God’s favor. In fact, just about every part of the world where our men live is about rewards they receive based upon their efforts. They pass their classes in school, find a good job, get promotions, and even win the heart of their wife through their effort. They know well the axiom, “there are no free lunches.”

The problem is that if they bring this “I have to earn God’s favor” attitude into their walk with God, it will destroy their potential for spiritual growth. They will focus on fixing their behavior, which will only lead to frustration, further guilt, and even anger with the God who demands perfection. Nothing poisons spiritual growth more than the inner belief that I have to be good so that God will love me.

The only way true spiritual growth takes place is for me to know that God loves me unconditionally despite my sin. Then my heart is free to respond to God’s love with my love.  I become motivated to follow his commandments not to earn his love but out of gratefulness for the love I already have!  A long term disciple-making ministry for men must reach their hearts. That is why we must create an atmosphere in our men’s ministry where men are taking constant gulps of grace.


Frequently Asked Questions In Men’s Ministry
From
www.pcacep.org/men

3. Why is it so difficult to get men to attend men’s ministry events?

A. Nearly all of the subgroups in the church (children, teens, college kids, singles, women, seniors) are strongly motivated to come to church events because they want to be with their friends. Men are not. Therefore, they don’t show up just because the bulletin says that a men’s event is planned.

B. Your men’s event takes men away from their homes. Many men already feel guilty about being away from home so much to do their jobs. So you have to overcome the guilt and pressure he feels NOT to be away from the family more.

C. For the 21st century man, time is the commodity of highest value. There has been an explosion of activities to compete for his time, from Karate for his kids to 200 channels on TV, including sports channels that have games nearly 24 hours a day. The length of the American work day is the highest it has ever been, while commuting time is increasing. He has less free time to give to a men’s event than ever before.

D. Today’s men are tired and busy. They spend their days in the work world where products and activities are assigned a bottom-line value. That is the way they will see your men’s event. Is the value of the event worth the time and effort to be involved? Out of a sense of commitment to the church, a man may come once to a men’s event. But tired, busy men will not consistently attend something that does not have high value to them.

E. The availability of graphic pornography at the click of a mouse means that more men are enslaved to secret sins than ever before. They may participate in something safe like playing softball. But, they won’t come regularly to events that get them connected to other men at the spiritual level. On the one hand, they know they need help, but they are terrified of the shame they would experience if they were found out.

F. Because of the way God has hardwired men, they are much more likely to come to an event when personally invited by another man. Most churches have not built a strong men’s ministry leadership team that reaches out to the men of the congregation to make these personal invitations. Instead, they resort to bulletin or pulpit announcements which are not very effective.

For answers to other frequently asked questions about men’s ministry click here


Understanding Where Men Are and How to Reach Them

By Pat Morley, David Delk, and Brett Clemmer adapted from No Man Left Behind (Moody, 2006)

A CHURCH was having its annual men’s retreat. A few of the men from the leadership team became a subcommittee to organize it. They set some goals:

  • Reach out to men who didn’t traditionally attend their church’s events.
  • Help men get to know each other on the retreat.
  • Develop a follow-up strategy that kept men involved after the retreat.

Eighty guys registered for the event, including twelve who were not very involved in the church and had never been on a retreat before. A businessman speak on a very practical level about how being a Christian affects your everyday life. The talks were short and had plenty of discussion time afterward. In order to make the new men feel comfortable, they allowed the men to sit wherever they wanted during the sessions and discussions.

They had lots of fun and competitive activities. And they offered a follow-up activity for guys to get involved in—smaller groups of men who would meet for six weeks to go deeper into the issues raised by the event.

During the retreat, it seemed as though guys were really getting to know each other. The discussion times were robust. The activities were fun and a lot of laughing and joking occurred throughout the weekend. At the end of the retreat, sixty men signed up for the follow-up, including eight of the twelve “fringe” men.

A SUCCESSFUL RETREAT . . . OR NOT?

A week or two later, the entire men’s ministry leadership team met, including the retreat planning team. The men’s ministry team leader opened the meeting with a time to debrief the retreat. The retreat team was excited to talk about their success and frankly eager for a few pats on the back. What they heard next blew them away.

“Well,” said one of the leaders, shifting uncomfortably, “I have to say I was really disappointed in the retreat this year. I just feel like we wasted an opportunity. For instance, the speaker hardly taught from the Bible; he mostly spoke about his own experiences.”

“And the discussion times . . . ” another man began. “Every time we were with different guys. We should have assigned guys to groups of four and stuck with those guys for the whole weekend and hopefully gotten into some deep issues.”

There were other comments about having more worship, guided private devotionals, and other “missed opportunities” from the retreat. The planning team was stunned. They had met every goal they’d set for the weekend, yet the leadership team was ripping it apart. What went wrong?... For the rest of the article click here.

 


What’s Happening Around the PCA? God is Moving In Men’s Ministry!

Samson and the Pirate Monks, By Nate Larkin.  Because of his own story of addiction and loss, Nate Larkin knows every man’s heart combines sinner and saint, pirate and monk. His book is about a real group of men who aren’t afraid to say so—real men whose honest admission of weakness has been the doorway to authentic calling. They call themselves the Samson Society. They started in Christ Community Church, Franklin TN, and their society is spreading to other PCA churches. Go to www.samsonsociety.org. to find out more.

Scotty Smith, the founding pastor of Christ Community writes, “Long before he sat down to commit his thoughts on the page, I watched Nate write about Samson and the Pirate Monks with his brokenness, his tears, and his thirst for the mercy and grace of God. And now, I have the joy of seeing the fruit of his journey and labor of love when I look into the eyes of men in our church who are part of the Samson Society—men who are discovering the wonder of the gospel, the necessity of brotherhood, and the hope of change.”  Scotty Smith, Founding Pastor of Christ Community Church, Franklin, TN

Gospel Man Conferences in 2009.   March 6-7 Orlando with Bryan Chapell and Ray Cortese
April 24-25 Atlanta with Nate Larkin and Scott Roley. Go to www.thegospelman.com


Did you know the PCA Bookstore has over fifty book titles specifically for men/ministry?
Click to view books in the Men's Ministry category.


 


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