Reaching Every Man

Does your church have an effective discipleship process for all the men in your church and community? Here is a way to find out. Rate your ministry on a scale of 1-10 in the following areas:

1. ____ Most men in our church understand what it means to be a disciple, and its importance.

2. ____ Most of the men in our church have a best friend or band of brothers who stand with him in his spiritual battles.

3. ____ Our ministry to men provides opportunities for men at all spiritual levels to become engaged.

4. ____ The participation level of men in our men’s events indicates that we are scratching where they itch.

5. ____ Our men’s hearts are captured by the desire to show Christ and his kingdom to the world.

Over the last ten years, several graduates of RTS Orlando, along with a third PCA member, began to conduct extensive research into churches that were effectively discipling men, to determine why they were so successful. They saw time and again that the churches with effective long term processes that produced Godly disciples followed the same principles. For example, they targeted the hearts of men, not their behavior. They thought of discipleship as a relational process that moves men down the discipleship path, so they were intentional about capturing the momentum from their events and building upon it. Instead of expecting the pastoral staff and elders to "disciple" all the men, they built strong lay men’s ministry leadership teams, making Eph. 4:16 the foundation of their discipleship approach. "From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work."

These three men, Pat Morley, David Delk, and Brett Clemmer found these key principles to be so consistent in successful men’s ministries that they put them into a book and designed training to make these valuable insights available to men’s ministry leaders across America. The book is called, No Man Left Behind. The insights are also taught in 20-hour regional seminars by the same name, and in a 4-hour Reader’s Digest version for local churches and presbyteries called, Reaching Every Man.

(Note: Men’s Fraternity Is a 3 year men’s discipleship curricula, designed by Robert Lewis, pastor-at-large of Fellowship Bible Church in Little Rock, Arkansas and author of Raising a Modern Day Knight. The first year curricula is entitled The Quest for Authentic Manhood. The material, which includes a weekly video clip, can be taught by the local church pastor in a large group setting, can be taught in a small group setting by watching the DVD, or can be listened to on CD by individuals. Pete Deison has been on the staff of Park Cities PCA in Dallas for over 10 years as the Minister of Discipleship.

GITG: Tell us about your experience with Men’s Fraternity.

Pete: It has been great. Just last week we ended the fourth year and we’ve had over 200 of our men involved. We started with The Quest for Authentic Manhood, and then repeated that a second year, which is what they suggested. Then we went on to Authentic Manhood: Winning at Work and Home, and concluded with The Great Adventure series. This is excellent material, which addresses topics men are interested in from a Biblical perspective.

GITG: On a continuum of spiritual maturity, where is this material targeted?

Pete: We had men of all age groups and spiritual maturity participate. But it is especially helpful as a pre-evangelism tool. The material starts out man-centered as a pre-evangelism door to attract men, but then takes them to the gospel.

Pete: "The program doesn’t provide material for training the small group leaders in follow-up.It is designed for the leader to facilitate only. In my opinion some follow up material would be helpful. It was left up to the discretion of the leader."

GITG: What about the strengths?

Pete: We have seen many men come to faith in Christ, many men’s lives changed, and many marriages saved. In fact, when we put Robert Lewis’ lecture up on our website, we found that many of the wives were going there to find out what we were talking about. Also, Lewis’ discussion of the "Father wound" gave our men a vocabulary to start to talk more about some of the wounds to their hearts that are obstacles to whole- hearted surrender to Christ.

The single greatest contribution you can make to your men is to help them change the core affections of their hearts. How? Here are a few suggestions:

• Teach them how to each day come humbly to foot of cross and surrender to the Lordship of Jesus.
• Teach your men that Christianity is not behavior modification; it’s heart transformation.
• Do not merely teach men to be better. Call them to be different—to join the cause of the gospel of Jesus Christ and to live in the shadow of that call.
• Men can already see your strengths, so reveal your weaknesses. God uses the weak things of this world for His glory. Make a seminal decision to be transparent.

"I have never seen anything like we are seeing today. There is no one better prepared to lead us than Pat Morley. He offers very practical answer to the questions that all of us are asking. You need to read this book to gain a proper perspective on what is really happening." Ron Blue, President, Kingdom Advisors

"I wholeheartedly endorse this book! If you—or someone you know—got caught out by the current economic meltdown, this is must reading. It’s a roadmap to spiritual and financial freedom. It's that good!" Howard Dayton, Chairman, Crown Financial Ministries.