A foundational principle in men’s ministry is recognizing that even though our men know Christ died for their sins, many, perhaps most, still feel too dirty and sinful to be loved by a holy God. No matter how good our programs are, how rich our Biblical insights may be, or how successful we are at helping men better connect, our men’s ministry will fall flat if our men’s guilt and failure make them doubt God’s love for them.
We must constantly strive to help men see that there is no greater mission than to be a part of God’s grand redemption of the cosmos, fighting Satan and his minions, being the first-fruits of the new creation, putting the values of the kingdom on display in our own lives, and invading every square inch of planet earth with the gospel of the kingdom of Christ!
Is it possible that today’s church has developed a culture that drives men away by asking them to check their masculinity at the door? This is Murrow’s thesis and it is well worth thinking about.
Sometimes Christian men who are losing their battles with lust are looking for a quick and easy solution that will fit comfortably into their schedule. “Give me three steps for winning this battle for sexual purity and I will take them next Thursday afternoon at 3:00 and get this problem solved.” But instant solutions to spiritual problems simply don’t exist.
Unlike the other sub-groups in the church (children, teens, college kids, singles, women) most men are not motivated to come to church activities because they want to be with their friends. Kids and teens are often bored and want to hang out with their church friends. Singles want to find a mate. Women are naturally motivated to connect with other women. But men’s hard wiring takes us in the opposite direction
Reliable studies indicate that over half of the Christian men in America have a major struggle with the pull of temptation to look at pornography. As Reformed believers, we understand that the only answer to this struggle is the power of the gospel to transform our hearts. We understand that the Biblical approach to the battle with lust is heart transformation, not just superficial behavior modification.
To build a sustainable ministry to men, you’ll need a solid foundation. That foundation starts with your focus. Discipleship is the portal priority through which all the other priorities of the church can be achieved. Only by moving through the discipleship gateway can people truly affect their church and their church affect them.
Surveys among Christian men routinely indicate that the temptation they struggle with the most is sexual lust. Long-term success in battling this temptation does not come in an easy three step formula. If overcoming sexual impurity were that easy, men would take those three steps and this would not be the huge problem among Christian men that it is.
Since our sexuality is so deeply rooted in us, this redemption can take a very long time. There are no simplistic answers or easy steps to sexual purity. Such purity is the result of our growth in holiness, what is called our sanctification. That is why real sexual purity only comes from the Biblical growth process of repentance, faith, and obedience.
You’ve got men, you’ve got a church. Add a testimony, some pancakes, and prayer and – poof! A men’s ministry. Right? Not necessarily. This book is based on over 30 years of combined ministry experience, of training classes at the Leadership Training Center and thousands of interactions with men’s ministry leaders. Read excerpts…