The
Case for a Men's
Discipleship Program
by
Patrick Morley
The
Presenting Problem
There
is raging all around us a battle for men’s souls. Men are under siege as
husbands, fathers, workers, citizens, and churchmen. Many have already
failed.
A
man said, “My marriage is perfect.” One year later an addiction to
pornography irretrievably shattered his marriage into a thousand shards.
“For
30 years I’ve spent 80 hours a week at work because that’s what I
wanted to do. I went to church one hour a week. I’ve missed it. I know
that there is another step I need to take.”
“I
didn’t give my wife a voice. Now I can’t convince her I want to
change.”
“No
matter what I did I could never please my father. And I’m doing it all
over again to my own son.”
Men
are under siege because their wives feel emotionally neglected or
controlled, their children are going astray, they’ve become addicted to
pornography or other idols, they have overspent and struggle under a load
of debt, and/or they are chasing worldly success.
Other
men are under siege because they are trying to do too many of the right
things. They are trying to be super-dad who makes all the games, the
perfect husband who meets all the emotional needs of his wife, a churchman
who makes a contribution, and the good provider who can afford the right
schools and labels. They are tired. We have created a culture that
requires more energy than men have to give.
The
Consequences
For
every 10 men in your church…
- 9
will have kids who leave the church (1)
- 8
will not find their jobs satisfying (2)
- 6
pay the monthly minimum on their credit card balances (3)
- 5
have a major problem with pornography (4)
- 4
will get divorced affecting 1,000,000 children per year (5)
- only
1 has a biblical worldview (6)
- all
10 will struggle to balance work and family
When
a man fails it sets powerful forces of bondage and brokenness in motion.
It can take several generations to break the cycle. I know. It has been
almost 80 years since my grandfather abandoned my dad, and our family has
yet to fully recover from that man’s horrific decision.
As
America staggers beneath the load of a 100 major problems like divorce,
fatherlessness, poverty, pornography, adultery, abortion, disrespect for
authority, ethical failures, and truancy—where have the men gone? Where
are the men? What has happened to our men?
These
are not bad men. No man fails on purpose. They are, for the most part, men
with good intentions. They are men for whom Christ died. He takes no
delight in the death of the wicked. But they lack spiritual power.
The
Root Cause
Why
do so many men lack spiritual power? Why do so many men seem tepid in
their faith? Why do so many men seem lukewarm? The answer is that these
men were never discipled with the spiritual weaponry to become Godly men,
husbands, and fathers. Jesus said, “The problem is that you don’t know
the Scriptures, and you don’t know they power of God” (Matthew 22:29,
NLT).
No
church leader would disagree that making disciples is a central mission,
perhaps the central mission, of the church. However, in our
generation the church has taken its eye off the ball. The Barna Group
reports that only 16% of church-attending adults are involved in
discipleship programs such as small groups, Sunday schools, and other
classes (Barna, 2000). And men are even less likely than women to be
involved in discipleship (Barna, 2004).
Many
church leaders indicate a profound dissatisfaction with the number of men
in their churches who are disciples. It is well known within the field of
men’s ministry that since 1990 many churches have implemented men’s
discipleship programs but have been unable to sustain them.
We
have not been effective in making disciples, especially among men, and
therefore we are failing significantly to achieve one of our central
missions. Not making disciples is the root cause of the battle in which we
find ourselves.
The
Solution
What
is the solution? The last words of Jesus arguably comprise the most
important speech ever recorded in the history of the world. We know them
as The Great Commission…
All
authority in heaven and earth has been given to me. Therefore, go and make
disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, the
Son, and the Holy Spirit. Teach them to obey everything I have commanded
you. And I will be with you to the end of the age (Matthew 28:18-20).
More
millions of people and billions of dollars have been mobilized as a result
of this brief speech than any other words ever uttered.
The
solution to this problem is for us to get back to the central mission of
the Christian church: making disciples. The final marching orders from
Jesus are, “Go and make disciples.” Those orders still stand. They
have not been amended, altered, or rescinded.
It
is worth reflecting on the fact that Jesus could have said anything. For
example…
He
could have said, “Go and make worshippers.” But he didn’t.
He said, “Go and make disciples.”
He
could have said, “Go and make workers.” But he didn’t. He
said, “Go and make disciples.”
He
could have said, “Go and make tithers.” But he didn’t. He
said, “Go and make disciples.”
Does
that mean Jesus isn’t interested in worshippers, workers, and tithers? Of
course he is. But Jesus knew we don’t get worshippers by trying
to make worshippers. We get worshippers by making disciples. Jesus knew we
don’t get workers by trying to make workers. We get workers by making
disciples. And so on. The key to success at every point is, “Go and make
disciples.”
There
is one, and only one, way in which a man can win the battle for his soul.
He must become a disciple of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
The
Plan: All-Inclusive Men’s Ministry
If
you have 100 men in your church, what is the size of your men’s
discipleship ministry? The correct answer is 100. A dozen white haired men
having breakfast together once a month and six guys in a Bible study on
Wednesday morning are good. But that leaves 82 men unaccounted for.
You’re setting those men up to lose the battle.
The
church is the only institution in the world that cares about men’s
souls. To fulfill Christ’s commission, your church should have a
concrete plan to disciple every willing man. If not us, then who?
This
is a battle we can win. We cannot, we must not and, by God’s grace,
together we will not fail
Copyright
© 2005, Man in the Mirror, Inc.
used with permission. Click
to view original article
|
